I’ve never been a fan of seeing my name on things, so I was always going to give this project a name of it’s own.
In thinking about what it is I do, I thought I’d come up with an interesting portmanteau to describe it. I (thought I had) invented a word – dis as in disability, and kinetic as in the kinetic energy and process of moving the gloves on stage to create sound. Playing with spelling and meaning, specifically the difference between dis- and dys- I googled my “invented” word. Imagine my surprise:
It appears to be an Americanism to some degree, which may explain why I’ve never heard my own condition described as dyskinetic. The coincidence is so extraordinary – if I believed in fate…
It’s coming naturally, it seems. This headspace is wide open right now. New riffs and melodies come into focus every day. Feeling the floodgates open, the pressure releasing; it’s beautiful. I hear this new sound in my head, as I’ve been listening to it for years.
It’s daunting too, of course. It’s a delicate task capturing it all, especially when this is catching me while I’m busy doing anything else. Inspiration doesn’t care if you’re busy spending time with your kids or not.
It’s not magic. This isn’t a go-me I’m-so-inspired thing. It’s (welcome) hard work. It’s the end result of well nurtured musical intelligence and creative thinking. I’ve been hearing this new sound for a long time, but between access barriers and experimental technology, I just didn’t know how to get it out of my head.
The trick, the only trick, is to quieten your mind enough to hear the ideas. I’ve no doubt that any songwriter worth their chops can “hear” fully formed musical ideas, so long as they’re open and receptive to notice. Turning down the noise of my own inner critic narrator is the real skill. Don’t break the surface. Don’t make ripples in the pond. Notice the still water.
Mostly though, I’m just excited. I’ve been thinking about this project for a long time, it’s taken me the last 12 months to gently get all it’s aspects into focus. And today I’ve finally created a few things worth getting excited about…
I’m not sure where (or what) the right headspace is to begin this. I guess that never comes. At some point you have to tear the plaster* off.
It’s New Year’s Day. I’m tired, and a little hungover. But there is much to explain. After all, it’s Year Zero. This year is all about this.
A set of sounds, colliding in my head. Apposite and Opposite. An intense, contradictory aesthetic, at once as fragile as it is heavyweight. A dissatisfaction with the translation from my heart/head to your ears. A need to return to the very root of it all. A challenge to reimagine what accessibility sounds like. An urge to return to the timeless instrument that defined me to me, and to bring it to the strange new instrument that defines me to you.
To be big.
To be dark.
To be loud.
To be heavy.
And so, it begins.
(*Band Aids, y’all)